This and that…


THIS AND THAT

(1) Leonardo DiCaprio never died in TITANIC.  In the last scene, he goes underwater, and in the first scene in INCEPTION, he is shown waking up on the beach.

(2) Why a Red Indian wears feathers on his head :  To keep his WIG WAM

(3) Police arrested 2 kids yesterday—-one for DRINKING BATTERY ACID, the other for EATING FIREWORKS.  They CHARGED the first one and LET THE OTHER ONE OFF.

(4) Ants stretch and yawn when they wake up in the morning.

(5) Patriotism is a kind of religion; it is the EGG from which WARS ARE HATCHED.

(6) The difference between WINNERS and LOSERS : It is the difference  between SQUASHING and BEING SQUASHED.

(7) Those with CLOSED MINDS never have to worry about THEIR BRAINS GATHERING DUST.

(8) All that glitters is not gold——-there is BRASS and COPPER, or it might be PLATED.

(9) Culture is to make a nice drinking bowl from ones enemy’s skull.  Civilisation is to go to prison for that.

(10) Depression is anger without motivation; it is like having an empty beer bottle with no one to throw it at.

(11) Even the mighty oak tree was just a little nut once—just like you.

(12) Laugh alone —–and the WORLD THINKS YOU’RE ON BLUETOOTH

(13) Artificial Intelligence is no match for NATURAL STUPIDITY.

(14)  For every good reason there is to lie, there is a BETTER REASON TO TELL THE TRUTH.

(15) If your dad is from Iceland and your mom is from Cuba, you would be an ICECUBE.

(16) If you reveal your secrets to the wind; you should not blame the wind for revealing them to the trees.

(17) The 3 reasons to move to Japan : 1% to learn a new language; 5% to experience a new way of life and 94% for the superfast internet speed.

(18) The best defence is a GOOD OFFENCE, and offence is the best form of defence.

(19) Noah shouted at the chickens in the Ark : they were USING FOWL LANGUAGE.

(20) DANGER is REAL ; FEAR is a CHOICE.

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