Here are some common characters one can witness :
(1) Stressed Mums Shouting At Their Husband and Children : Common rants and nags include : “I gave you the passports.” As soon as boarding is announced, they rush to stand first in queue as if the plane were to leave without them.
(2) Lazy Dads Who Look Like They Would Rather Be At Home Watching Football : Under strict orders by their wives to push the luggage trolley, they are probably looking for the nearest emergency exit.
(3) Anxious Children Who Worry About Every Tiny Detail : Take that process of moving forward by a foot every two minutes in the queue for check-in for example. The little voices from behind you make statements like, “Mummy, hen people start moving forward, this girl doesn’t move.”
(4) The Screaming Toddler Throwing A Tantrum Inside The Toilet : Mothers can’t make their children understand that it’s harder to ‘go’ on a crowded plane, which will not stop for 10 hours.
(5) Confused Elderly People Getting Lost At The Airport : You normally hear them say —— “I can’t find my glasses,” or “Where did I put my sandwiches ?” or “It’s a long walk, isn’t it ? Do you think the man on that buggy will take us ?”
(6) Foreign Travellers At Check-in With A Language Barrier : Sometimes, you’ll find them failing to understand or be understood by the airport staff. They often need to be explained that their luggage exceeds the weight limit / they will need a visa.
(7) Pretentious Women Who Think Being At The Airport Is Equivalent To Being On The Ramp : Sunglasses and signature at the ready, they strut around arrogantly in high heels, fur coats and skinniest pair of jeans, with flashy handbags slung over their arm as they wait to be ‘discovered’ like Kate Moss. They’re most likely to be found in the perfume section.
(8) Precocious Young Teenage Girls Aspiring To Be Pretentious Women : Reluctant to be seen with their ’embarrassing’ family, they saunter around in boots with garish, almost-empty handbags slung over their arm as they wait to be discovered by One Direction. Also most likely to be found in the perfume section.
(9) The ‘LADS’ : Wearing singlets and snapbacks, they are probably heading to Kavos. They exchange loud ‘banter’about Lee’s hand luggage being searched and their huge stack of condoms exposed . Getting drunk on the plane is a key aim.
(10) The Posh ‘LADS’ : Wearing suede shoes, they are probably heading to ‘Croatiahhh’. Often found ‘har har’-ing at videos, or in duty-free, swiping their father’s credit card.
(11) Scruffy Backpackers Lying Asleep Across Two Seats Somewhere : Often the recipients of revolted looks, children are warned to stay clear of them, in case they catch something.
(12) The ‘hen-do’ Ladies In Matching T-shirts : As they cackle about their ditsy mistakes at security, you silently plead that they won’t be on your flight.
(13) The 17 Year Old ‘girly-holiday’ Gang : As they gossip loudly about so-and-so’s bikini diet and compare their fake tan choices, you hope they won’t be on your flight either.
(14) The Disgusted-looking Businessman : In a suit sipping a coffee with his laptop in front, he is too important for these lower-class vermin and can’t wait to get into First Class.
(15) The Couple Going On Their First Holiday together : Clinging to her boyfriend, the girlfriend chatters away about how excited she is, and gives repeated run-throughs of the itinerary she has planned for them. Meanwhile, the boyfriend is constantly glancing at the seductive ladies in the perfume adverts.
(16) People Taking Forever To Make Purchase Choices : Besides the holiday reading issue, the key decision-muddler is which gift to bring their holiday hosts.
(17) Shop assistants On The Night Shift looking Depressed : They thought a job at a leading airport would be super glamorous, how wrong they were !
(18) Phone Addicts : They are probably tagging their exact location within the airport on social media, with a complementary ‘selfie’ thrown in.
(19) The Catwalk Of The Female Cabin Crew : Working it with fixed smiles, pencil skirts and slick buns as they drag along their suitcase, this is their warm-up for that long-awaited moment of fame —– the flight safety demonstration.
(20) The Loners : With nobody to talk to, they might be seen recounting in their journal how they ‘found themselves’ in Terminal 1 or, out of boredom, compiling lists like tis one.
————- Shannon Colman – HuffingtonPost.in